We all have one of there main attachment styles: secure, avoidant or Black Women this is my Hallmark Christmas movies watching shirt, sweater. These are coping mechanisms. If you go from one unfulfilling encounter to another and you are in your late 20’s, or older, you likely have one of the insecure attachment styles (anxious or avoidant). Securely attached people tend to settle down easily, not because they are smarter, or look like supermodels, but because they are not giving off nervous energy fueled by unhelpful beliefs regarding relationships. I don’t think your expectations are the main problem. If you fall into the avoidant or anxious-preoccupied categories, you could be subconsciously scaring off secure men and attracting emotionally unavailable ones.
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The anxious and the avoidants attract each other in Black Women this is my Hallmark Christmas movies watching shirt, sweater. They fall into instant relationships and try to make love happen based on superficial ideas. When the relationship progresses, the avoidant starts to retreat loses interest, and the “needy” or “clingy” anxious party starts to pursue, demanding an explanation. Rinse and repeat. If you are anything like I was, you may be dismissing secure men as boring or uninterested. This reminds me of all those questions where parents are asking how to stop or forbid their kids from doing certain things. The end result is typically, you allow them to do the act, but have a discussion beforehand and after to help guide them through. The exception being something potentially harmful such as drugs. Reason being, when you tell someone no or forbid the act, the person will often sneak around and do said act.